Oh, those surprises that overtake one when least expected.
Reminiscing (and more) with a childhood friend from The Block, from way back, going here and there, back and forth, up The Block and down...so many ways to access memory and truth and those places in between...we came across a time when a mother of a family died. This was in the 1960s: the 5th Ave. Gang was in its heyday. We were many and ran about up and down the block,; through the Presidio and back; to Clement St. for candy or for toys at King Norman's. One foggy summer (maybe 1968? 1969? 1967?) the mother of three boys died. Suddenly, to us smallish children. Tonight I was told a memory of one child on The Block that I had never known with regard to this event that made impressions on all us children then.
This child happened to be in our house that day. I don't recall where I was. Perhaps I was in the house and wasn't privy to this specific interaction. She was told of the news of our friends' mother's death, and she laughed. She instantly felt that laughter was probably wrong (understandably), but this is a person, then a child, who is and was then a thoughtful, sensitive, caring person. She didn't know on any level why she laughed, but as a child it was her reaction. My mother (aka in this blog Aged Parent, who was obviously not then Aged) reassured her that laughter and crying are both on the spectrum (perhaps not in those words) and that both are loving responses and nothing to be ashamed of. This child has remembered this as a caring and supportive response to a frightening time in all our lives here on The Block — what a special memory.
I could never have known than Aged Parent was capable of such a detailed panoramic knowledge of a child's experience of an almost unknowable part of life and indeed how to respond to it in the moment.
May we all know that laughing and crying are in our lives for such important reasons.
Reminiscing (and more) with a childhood friend from The Block, from way back, going here and there, back and forth, up The Block and down...so many ways to access memory and truth and those places in between...we came across a time when a mother of a family died. This was in the 1960s: the 5th Ave. Gang was in its heyday. We were many and ran about up and down the block,; through the Presidio and back; to Clement St. for candy or for toys at King Norman's. One foggy summer (maybe 1968? 1969? 1967?) the mother of three boys died. Suddenly, to us smallish children. Tonight I was told a memory of one child on The Block that I had never known with regard to this event that made impressions on all us children then.
This child happened to be in our house that day. I don't recall where I was. Perhaps I was in the house and wasn't privy to this specific interaction. She was told of the news of our friends' mother's death, and she laughed. She instantly felt that laughter was probably wrong (understandably), but this is a person, then a child, who is and was then a thoughtful, sensitive, caring person. She didn't know on any level why she laughed, but as a child it was her reaction. My mother (aka in this blog Aged Parent, who was obviously not then Aged) reassured her that laughter and crying are both on the spectrum (perhaps not in those words) and that both are loving responses and nothing to be ashamed of. This child has remembered this as a caring and supportive response to a frightening time in all our lives here on The Block — what a special memory.
I could never have known than Aged Parent was capable of such a detailed panoramic knowledge of a child's experience of an almost unknowable part of life and indeed how to respond to it in the moment.
May we all know that laughing and crying are in our lives for such important reasons.
Nice evening of reminiscing that was. So many memories. We each (clearly) have our own stories that we've held close for too long. They reveal themselves when they are supposed to be revealed, and they are often more potent than we believe they are, until they are realized. XO
ReplyDelete